


Red Feathers

by write_read_play



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, OQ Happy Ending Week
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-15
Updated: 2018-07-25
Packaged: 2019-06-10 23:23:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 20,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15302319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/write_read_play/pseuds/write_read_play
Summary: My single, multi-chapter fiction entry for OQ Happy Ending Week, satisfying Sunday's Prompt, Canon Happy Ending.If the series finale left you feeling disappointed because all we got was a three minute OQ scene and no real closure, this is the fic that fixes it and gives Robin and Regina the ending they deserved.





	1. The Scroll

**Author's Note:**

> The idea for this story came to mind right after watching the series finale. I'm posting it today even though it is still unfinished and I'm sorry about that. I'm a full time mom to a special kiddo and I'm also in grad school meaning: I'm usually drowning in either house work or school work while fantasizing about having nannies, chefs, and housekeepers, lol. Let me know what you think and whether or not this story is worth continuing. One final note: I had planned on running this through a beta beforehand, but I ran out of time. Any and all mistakes are my own.

_Life is good_ , Regina thought to herself. Over a year had gone by since her coronation as Good Queen of the United Realms, and yet it all felt like it had happened in the blink of an eye. 

As newly elected ruler, Regina had had to incorporate several new laws around Storybrooke, mainly when it came to modes of transport since there were suddenly dragons (and other objects) flying around freely. She’d seen Aladdin and Jasmine hovering on their magic carpet a handful of times, usually coming or going to and from Granny’s, though not as much anymore since Jasmine was expecting their first baby. Aladdin, it seemed, had a thing for burgers and chocolate milkshakes.

But that wasn’t all. There were now also knights on horseback and horse-driven carriages brought over from _all_ versions of the Enchanted Forest, galloping through the streets of Storybrooke. Thankfully though, the only dragons currently inhabiting the area were Maleficent and Lily, and as a courtesy to their good friend, the Queen, they were always mindful about flying high when inside the small town’s proper. Carriages were relatively easy to deal with since the drivers maneuvered the roads the same way they had in their original realms. Knights on horseback, however, were a completely different story. There were simply too many of them to keep track of, and in an effort to help Emma, Killian and David with law enforcement, she’d hired several of the dwarves to serve as officers, including some of their counterparts from the Wish Realm. Even Sir Henry had stepped up and offered to help them initially—all but Snow, whom Regina nominated to run for Mayor of Storybrooke. She ran unopposed and had settled into Regina’s former mayoral office. Much to her chagrin, the tree patterned wallpaper had been replaced by a bright blue hue that resembled the sky. Snow had taken some cheesecloth and dabbed it over the color creating a cloudy kind of feel to the paint, and Regina had to admit that it wasn’t as terrible as the bird painting she’d once brought in and hung on a wall. Snow had smiled and the following week when Regina had stopped in to meet her for lunch, she saw a framed picture of brightly colored koi which made her smirk. Giving her a knowing look, Snow said, “You hate it.”

“No,” she answered shrugging cheerfully. “It’s simply _not_ me. But now that it’s your office, you’re free to do whatever you like with it.” And then, with a deep breath, she’d turned around so that she could finally roll her eyes and bite her bottom lip in a smile. Once she made it to her new car, she let out a loud laugh and texted Zelena, receiving a sarcastically witty reply about Snow’s taste in decor. Zelena had replied, “It’s always animals with her.”

Although they’d had a rocky beginning, Sir Henry had, with time, grown closer to her. He’d quickly discovered that law enforcement wasn’t exactly his forte and he preferred a quieter occupation. When Regina suggested that he should run Gold’s Pawnshop, he didn’t hesitate to take her up on the offer. This version of Henry, similar to the other, began to realize after nearly killing her that she wasn’t the same Evil Queen his grandparents had banished in his realm. The fact that Snow and David were very much alive and living in Storybrooke helped him with his grief in a big way, and they showered him with love and kindness, just as they’d always done to his older self. And though they both knew that no amount of apologizing from Regina would bring the grandparents he knew and loved back, she never stopped trying to make it up to him, and on his part, Sir Henry slowly chose to give Regina that chance.

After staying at Granny’s Bed & Breakfast for nearly ten months, she’d offered him _her_ Henry’s old room, and after giving it some thought, the young man had eventually chosen to move in with her. He’d given up seeking revenge and began to let go of his anger, forgiving Regina for having crushed Queen Snow and King David’s hearts. It had been a long journey to healing. At Regina’s insistence, they’d begun attending therapy sessions together with Archie several weeks after the union of the realms.

Sir Henry didn’t understand what the point to talking about it to a third party was, but Archie helped him process that pain and understand that Regina hadn’t meant to murder anyone intentionally. It was a horrible accident and she wished every day she’d never done it. Logically he understood why she had, but his heart took longer to learn to forgive. It had been a slow process, and things between them weren’t fully healed but Regina knew Sir Henry was trying when he’d make rude, seething remarks directed at her, then immediately soften his expression and murmur an earnest apology. She understood he’d been in pain for so long, and at first she wasn’t sure how to express her love for him, because he was still Henry, or a part of _her_ _Henry_ was in him, and she couldn’t _not_ love her son. It was that love that enabled her to continue doing things for him, the same way she’d done them for his double, and in time, they’d begun to trust and care for one another. He never called her _‘Mom,’_ because he still viewed Emma that way, but he did come up with a nickname for her. After watching _Alien_ , Sir Henry fell in love with the storyline about the complex but unequivocally strong woman battling extraterrestrials, and he’d begun calling Regina ‘ _Ripley_.’ She didn’t mind it to much, so long as it only came from him, and when Snow used the nickname jokingly one afternoon, Regina had given her a glare reminiscent of her former days as Evil Queen. Snow quickly recovered and never made the mistake again.

Her days were busy. Opening the door and stepping inside the mansion at 108 Mifflin, she’s grateful to be home after such a long day. A castle had been built and offered to her, but Regina gracefully declined living in it, opting for her house instead. After living in castles in the Enchanted Forest, the last place she’d wanted to be in was _another_ castle. This wasn’t just a fancy house to her, with all the modern conveniences like electricity and indoor plumbing offered by the Land Without Magic. This was _home_. More specifically, it was _her_ home. It’s where Henry had grown up, and where, for a brief time, she’d lived as a family with Henry, Robin, and Roland.

_Roland_ , she thought. The little dimpled thief was now a tall, handsome 24-year old man. The Merry Men had raised him, but he’d made sure to attend her coronation. Her lips turned up in a smile as she recalled the memory of when the young man had stepped before her, bowing down low to offer a reverent, “Your Majesty.” When he’d stood back up and met her eyes, Regina frowned and after a beat, she knew who he was. She’d recognize those dimples anywhere. “Roland?!,” she’d gasped, and before he’d answered, she’d pulled him into her arms, crushing him in a tight hug, her hands on his cheeks as she kissed his forehead.

“Hi Gina. It’s so great to see you,” he said. His voice was expectedly deeper but his smile hadn’t changed, and his eyes twinkled with the same mischief they did when he was a boy. The same dark curls graced his head, though the back and sides had been trimmed shorter and he kept the top half of his locks neatly pinned back in a ponytail. He resided with the Merry Men still but after the coronation, he often came by the mansion to have dinner with Regina, the first time begging her to make him that delicious lasagna for dinner and the apple turnovers he’d loved so much as a boy for dessert.

Tonight, however, Regina doesn’t have plans. Everyone was out and on their own. Sir Henry was on a date with a young lady named Fiona, who ironically was a cousin of Violet, her Henry’s former girlfriend. He’d let her know he wouldn’t be home until late since they were going to dinner, the movies, and afterward to a new arcade and miniature golf park that Regina had created on Storybrooke’s grounds, about three blocks away from Granny’s near the toll bridge.

Regina was content with her life. She had been given many second chances in her life, including some she knew well she didn’t deserve. All except for one.

She always thought of him. More so on quiet evenings at home like this when she sat on her sofa and shut her eyes, relaxing her tired legs as a glass of wine sat on the coffee table before her. “Robin,” she whispered out loud breaking the silence in her living room, and as her eyes opened, they landed forlornly at her empty fireplace. Robin may have died nearly two decades ago, but he always remained in her heart, just as he’d promised a year ago. Remembering that dream she’d had, the one in the tavern where they’d spoken then kissed, there wasn’t any doubt in her mind that it hadn’t truly happened. It was confirmation that Robin’s soul had never been obliterated, that he’d been waiting somewhere for her. What haunted her often was wondering exactly where that _somewhere_ was.

Reaching for the glass of wine, she tipped it and immediately felt the rush of liquid in her mouth, flavors bursting on her tongue. As Regina swallowed, a cloud of dark smoke appeared, scaring the hell out of her and causing her to stand. Simultaneously dropping the glass and summoning a fireball in her palm, she braced herself for a fight until the cloud had vanished and there stood Queenie, smirking at the fire Regina’s hand.

“Sorry for startling you,” she says lackadaisically, smoothing out some imaginary creases in her long skirt as Regina extinguishes the fireball. “I found something that might interest you. May I sit down?”

Regina nods at her double while extending her hand toward an empty armchair next to the couch. “Would you like something to drink?”

“No, thank you. How is ruling the realms treating you these days?” Queenie wonders and Regina answers her with a tired smirk. “I wasn’t going to say anything, but you do look positively exhausted, dear. You know,” she says tentatively, “it wouldn’t hurt you to join me and Zelena at our next spa day. Of course the invitation is _always_ open,” she says smiling.

Regina nods her head and chuckles. “I may just take you up on it one of these days. So…what did you want to talk about? And where’s Robin?”

Queenie takes a deep breath and says he’s out with the Wish Realm's version of the Merry Men as Regina sighs. Keeping track of everyone’s twin in addition to ruling and everything else in her life is incredibly draining. “They’re out in the Sherwood Realm doing something called ‘off-roading.’ I’m not entirely sure what it means other than he’s going to come home dirty,” she laughs then leans forward in the armchair, looking into Regina’s identical chocolate orbs, taking hold of her double’s hands. “When you, and everyone else, gave pieces of your hearts to the curse that brought everyone here, uniting all the realms, one realm you don’t know about yet came too—one neither of us had heard of before.” Brow furrowing, Regina tenses and asks which one. “The Ethereal Realm,” Queenie says. “That’s where _he_ is. _Your_ Robin.”

Regina blinks several times, her mind echoing Queenie’s succinct words. “Is… Are you sure? How did you find out about this alleged ‘Ethereal Realm’?”

Clicking her tongue in mock offense, Queenie says, “Come now, Regina. You and I may no longer be the same person, but you know we will always share a bond. We’re a part of each other, as you said. Naturally, I know about the dream you had last year. The one where the two of you met at the tavern.” Squeezing her hands, she adds, “I know about the red feather he gave you.”

Regina’s vision clouds with unshed tears. “How do you…? I…” Her mouth opens and closes as she tries to find the words but fails. Suddenly the exhaustion she was feeling a few minutes ago feels like it’s multiplied tenfold. All she wants to do is lie down, but Queenie is speaking to her again.

“I’ve had dreams about him and I meeting in _that_ tavern. I found it unusual because it was empty. In my dream, the place felt cold until fire appeared behind me in the fireplace. I thought it was me—that I was watching myself, observing—as the scene unfolded before my eyes. That’s when I saw it wasn’t really me; it was you. You and him. _Robin_. Anyhow,” she says letting go of her hands as she reached into the small satchel that hung beside her hip. “I did a little digging around and found this,” she says handing Regina a parchment scroll.

Regina takes it from her and unrolls the paper, her lips mouthing the words she reads silently. Mouth agape, she looks at Queenie in shock. “I can visit Robin in this Ethereal Realm? Using the red feather he gave me?” Her bottom lip trembles, and Queenie can see the struggle in Regina’s eyes; she can sense her double’s internal conversation, telling herself not to get her hopes up too high because it never works out for her and her Robin. The guilt gnaws at her. Regina deserves her own happy ending with her Robin. No one else has worked this hard to be a hero, no one else has given up so much for others’ happiness. She thinks of how Regina brought back her Robin of Locksley, believing she would be granted a second chance only to have it once again cruelly taken from her in an unexpected turn of events.

Regina already knew Robin was alive, in some way, only she hadn’t known exactly _where_ he was or even where they’d been other than that ill-fated tavern, or a version of it. She’d always just assumed it was a dream, telling herself over and over again that it wouldn’t ever have been, or could ever be, more. But it was also a way for her to convince herself that Robin’s soul was at peace and definitely in a better place. Regina’s thoughts were scattered and she could feel a monstrous headache coming on as Queenie once more interrupted her thoughts.

“Regina,” she says, taking hold of her hands once more and pulling her up to stand before her. “All you need to do is hold the feather in your hand as you fall asleep and think of him. It’s that easy. However, there is one caveat,” Queenie says and Regina murmurs _Of course there is_ as her eyes quickly scan the parchment again, finding the fine print, so to speak, just as her double voices it out loud. “You can only visit him…”

“Once a year, after a full 365 days have passed,” Regina finishes the sentence, and with a huff of resentment and exasperation, she angrily drops the parchment on the coffee table as her nostrils flare. “Of course there’s a catch. There’s _always_ a catch when it involves Robin and me,” she says, a furious edge in her tone. “Sometimes I wonder why pixie dust even deemed us soulmates, especially when there’s always some damned _hoop_ we have to jump through just to be together. I suppose I should feel lucky I’m even able to see him at all. But I’d be lying if I said it didn’t bother me that once more there are conditions. And I’ll never get to be with him fully, not until I…” she adds, her voice cracking.

Queenie wraps her arms around her. “It’s been over a year, Regina. Wouldn’t you like to see him again?” 

Wiping an errant tear from her cheek, the Good Queen sniffles. Leaning back to look at her double she angles her head and whispers, “I don’t know.” Queenie conjures a box of tissues in her hand and pulls a couple out, handing them to Regina. “Part of me does, yes. But it’s that same part that doesn’t want to let him go again and I know I’ll have to and it’s going to suck all over again. It was fine when I’d believed it was only a dream,” she shrugs. “You know, the last time we saw each other. But knowing this now…” She looks down at the discarded parchment on the coffee table. “I’m conflicted. I can’t keep saying goodbye to Robin. Surely you can understand that.”

Nodding in agreement, Queenie tells her she does—that she probably understands better than anyone else. “Put yourself in Robin’s shoes. You are able to visit him. Regina, he _can’t_ leave the Ethereal Realm. Don’t you think he’d love to see _you_?”

Taking a shuddering breath, she clutches the tissues in her hand tightly until they’re a ball. “Of course I would. But what happens when we have to say goodbye again, hmm? It’s only going to hurt us more, knowing we can’t be together, knowing we have to remain apart. And that we have to wait a full _year_ before seeing each other again? It’s like torture. Besides,” she scoffs. “How would I get back home? Magic beans are still pretty rare. Tiny’s working on trying to create hybrid beans but there’s not telling where the traveler would end up. Could be home, could be in a pig’s sty, ass over tea kettle.”

Queenie purses her lips. She was prepared for this; after all, she would likely have the same pessimistic reaction and Regina has every right to feel this way. However, she also knows something that Regina is likely too tired or too stressed out to realize: that this will work. “According to that parchment,” she says pointing at it, “Robin is supposed to give you a red feather, just like he did the first time. The _feather_ is what returns you home. And Robin knows it.”

Regina gasps. “He does?” Robin hadn’t mentioned it last year, but in all fairness, their reunion had been very brief. She was so convinced it had been a dream her subconscious conjured to deal with the very real possibility that she herself might be dead the next day. “I thought… I was sure that that had only been a dream. I mean, it’d _felt_ real at the time, but I thought my son, _our_ son, was going to kill me. Well, a version of him anyway. And you’re saying Robin knows he’s in this Ethereal Realm, and that’s where I apparently went? You’re sure?” All this time, Regina had dismissed it, had continued to live her life, and though she missed him and wished she could see and speak to Robin again, it was a different feeling; a sense of peace always came over her when she thought of her thief, an innate knowledge that he was alright, that he was waiting for her somewhere, and that Hades had lied.

“I am and he most certainly does. I did some research, with _my_ Robin’s help of course,” Queenie smirked.

Regina’s thoughts carried her back to the Wish Realm, back to her first meeting with Robin of Locksley. She remembered how fast her heart had beat then when she and Emma had stood on the deserted beach, Locksley’s bow and arrow aimed at them. They’d ducked, narrowly avoiding one of his arrows, lodged fiercely into a piece of driftwood. At the time, she’d believed it was her soulmate reincarnated, only to later discover the heartbreaking news that this was most definitely not her Robin when she’d found him at the town line with Zelena and the baby, trying to leave Storybrooke, his biting words that he could never live up to the legacy of the man who had died for her.

Truly, no one since ever could.

Regina’s temper flares again as she answers with a sarcastic, “Really?” She’s tried to visit Queenie and Locksley since the realms were united, but seeing Queenie living out a version of the happy ending that could have very well been _her own_ , with her Robin, was excruciating to witness for very long. So Regina kept her visits few and far between, and Locksley was always polite and friendly enough, sensing her discomfort and leaving her be. Though he and Queenie had both turned over a new leaf as their loved blossomed, it hadn’t escaped Regina’s notice that he’d started to become more and more like her Robin. It was too painful.

Mercifully, her newly elected position barely left time in Regina’s schedule for much of a social life anyway, and on some level, Queenie understood Regina’s feelings, so she was the one most likely to pop by for a visit, usually coming alone. “How?” Regina asks.

 

  
“A few weeks ago, my husband woke up startled and in a cold sweat. His heart was beating rapidly and he kept repeating over and over again, _‘Give her the scroll, tell her she can see me.’_ After he calmed down, he said he’d seen Robin Hood. Then he told me about the scroll, and when I asked about it, he got out of bed and pulled it out of his satchel.”

Regina’s eyes widened. “Just like when Page 23 first appeared to him at the library,” she whispers. “How did he know?”

Queenie shrugs. “He was pale and obviously shaken. I’ve never seen him that way before, so I didn’t ask, but it seemed like it had been a dream or vision. I didn’t bring it up anymore after that night. I took it from his hand and read. Regina, I tried getting a hold of you sooner, but you’ve been very busy. I ran into the Savior and the Pirate this afternoon, and they told me you’d said something about relaxing at home tonight with a glass of wine and possibly a bubble bath. I’ve yet to try one of those my dear, but when I do…”

Regina holds up her hand and blurts, “Stop. Don’t. I don’t need, or want, to hear any details. I get it.” Queenie smirks amusingly at her. Regina knows she’s got good in her now, but there’s still that devilish dark edge she lived with for so long, and it makes her chuckle. “Alright. Let’s say I do this. Do you know how long I’d have? As in, how much time would I be able to spend with Robin?”

“That’s where things become unclear.”

Angling her head toward the ceiling, Regina’s eyes close and she says, “Of course. How are they unclear?”

 

“Time moves differently in the Ethereal Realm. What felt to you like a few minutes can actually be an hour or half a day. If I were to guess, I would say you can probably spend one entire day with him, but I must warn you Regina: if he doesn’t give you the feather before dawn in the Ethereal Realm, your soul will remain there…while your body begins to… _rot_ …here,” she says, her expression turning somber.

Regina sighs audibly, and rubs her temples. The headache she’d been feeling coming on is beginning to feel more like the early stages of a migraine. “I don’t want to be rude, but…I’d like to be alone now, please.”

Queenie steps in front of her, embracing her once more, then plants a tender kiss on her cheek before stepping away. Her arms come up and Regina watches as she vanishes in a cloud of smoke.

Suddenly she’s very much alone with nothng but her swirling thoughts, a nearly empty glass of wine, and her eyes fill with tears. Taking a deep breath, she speed walks out of the living room, heading up the stairs to her bedroom where she opens the door and stands before her dresser, opening the top left drawer and pulling out the red feather Robin gave her last year.

…~~…~~…

The sensation of warm lips pressed to her forehead, kissing her tenderly wakes her as her hand comes up and caresses stubble she’s intimately acquainted with. “Robin?,” she asks in a raspy, sleep-addled voice, her eyes fluttering open, adjusting to the semi-darkness.

“Yes, my love, it’s me,” comes the all too familiar accent.

She is wide awake in an instant, hugging _her Robin_ with the intensity she didn’t think to use last year.


	2. The Ripple

Another year had gone by in the blink of an eye, and the only emotion Regina felt she was capable of was fury. Though she continued to rule fairly over the realms, a part of her former darkness was edging itself back in, bit by bit. Seeking solace, she’d hidden herself away in a distant valley within the New Enchanted Forest no one knew about, throwing fireballs in every direction; into the ground, at helpless tree trunk stumps, she’d burned everything in her sight until unshed tears clouded her vision, making her collapse on the ground, violently sobbing. ‘ _How dare she leave out that detail?,’_ she thinks bitterly.

…~~…~~…

Upon her return from what was now her second visit to the Ethereal Realm, Queenie and Zelena had arrived with a fearful look in their eyes.

“What?,” Regina asks, looking from one to the other. “You know, the two of you and I are going to have to sit down and discuss boundaries when it comes to visiting someone’s home. You just can’t pop in unannounced whenever you want to—“

Zelena cuts her off. “Is it true then? Did you visit him—Robin Hood—in the Ethereal Realm?” she asks, her eyes wide with… _fear_?

Regina was having a hard time understanding why they were there so early. She’d barely finished brewing her usual morning coffeepot, the air around them rich with the heavenly aroma of her favorite dark roast.

Narrowing her eyes at the two women, Regina licks her lips before she nods her head. Her admission causes Zelena to curse under her breath, her fingers rubbing anxiously at her forehead.

“Regina? Let’s sit, shall we?” Queenie says, motioning to the dining table and chairs in the other room. “Are you alone?”

“Yes. What’s going on? May I at least have my coffee first? Since you’ve decided to invade my privacy _and_ my peace, in one fell swoop I might add—”

Zelena cuts her off once more. “Why bother beating around the bush with you? With every visit to that place, that _Ethereal Realm_ ,” she says in disgust, “you are losing a piece of your soul. The more you go back to visit him, the less time you’ll remain alive.” 

Queenie nods solemnly when Regina looks over at her. Taking a deep breath in and letting it out audibly, Regina turns away toward her counter, pulling a mug out of the cabinet and pouring herself a cup of coffee. She walks silently to the refrigerator and grabs the soy creamer, pouring a small amount into her mug along with one sugar cube. Continuing to avoid her guests, she walks out of her kitchen and into the dining room, pulling out a chair and sitting down in it before bringing the steaming mug to her lips.

Regina’s eerie silence is something Queenie and Zelena weren’t prepared for. They look at each other, neither one knowing what to say or where to start, so instead they each grab their own mugs and pour themselves a cup of coffee as well before joining her.

After minutes of silently sipping her coffee, Regina finally clears her throat. “How many times do I have left?”

“You mean, how many times can you go visit him?” Queenie asks and Regina nods. “I don’t know, and I’m so sorry. We didn’t find out about this until after I left you the other night.”

Uncomfortable and indignant, Zelena takes her hand and says, “Sis, we will think of something. I’m sure if we put our heads together…”

Regina’s lips purse into a thin line as she asks, “Get Tinkerbell. I need to speak with her immediately.” 

…~~…~~…

The doorbell rings a few hours later, and Regina smoothes her slacks out before reaching for the knob. The petite blonde fairy stands before her, wearing a brightly colored yellow shirt with a pattern of green and gold arrows. _How fitting_ , Regina thinks.

“Hello Regina,” she smiles brightly at her. “I heard you wanted to see me.”

“I do, Tink. Come in,” she gestures her hand, welcoming her into the expansive foyer before leading her into the living room. “Can I get you anything? Iced tea? Some water?”

Shaking her head, Tink declines the offer, saying she’s fine and thanks her. They sit on opposite ends of the couch, and Regina pulls a throw pillow onto her lap, picking at an imaginary piece of lint nervously.

“Tinkerbell,” she starts, “When you used the pixie dust to help me find Robin, did you have any idea what would happen between us?”

The fairy leans forward, looking at her curiously. “Meaning, did I know Robin would die for you?” When Regina nods, the fairy scoots closer to her, taking her hands in her own. “No. I did not. I told you many years ago that the pixie dust doesn’t declare anyone’s fate; it only shows you the possibilities.”

“And what you saw, or the pixie dust saw, between us — that was _only_ a possibility… of a future together or was there anything…more?” Regina asks, licking her lips nervously. If Tink notices that her heart is hammering in her chest, she says nothing of it.

She looks into her eyes for several seconds and they feel like an eternity. The only sound heard in the room is the echoing tick-tock of seconds going by coming from the clock on the mantel. Tink starts then stops a few times before Regina squeezes her fingers. “Tell me. I have the right to know,” she whispers.

“Yes, the dust showed you the possibility, and when you two were together, had Robin been alive, you would have had a future together. No Zelena dressed as Marian would have made a difference, not even with the child they share. He was destined to fall in love you just as you were destined to fall in love with him. However,” she says and looks down at their hands between them, “the night I took you to the tavern, and you chose not to go inside, you created a ripple. One that you’re now feeling the effects of.”

Furrowing her brows, Regina looks at her in confusion. “I don’t understand.”

“Remember what I said in Neverland? That you didn’t only ruin your life, you also ruined his?”

Regina’s eyes well up at the memory. She can’t help but picture that moment in time, frozen in her mind the same way that Robin’s final look before his soul drifted away into nothingness had haunted her since that moment he’d sacrificed himself for her. The lump is hard, making it painful for her to swallow. A tear falls down her cheek before she can rein in her emotions. “I remember,” she says quietly.

“Ripples are what happen when you’re given a gift, especially one as precious as the one I gave you that night Regina. You of all people should know that all magic…”

“Comes with a price,” she finishes for Tink, looking up at her ceiling bitterly. “So by not going into that tavern that night, by not finding Robin Hood then…”

Tink nods at her, squeezing her hands once again. “Your actions spoke for you. You unknowingly threw away your chance at happiness. I’m not sure you could have saved Robin from his death, but you might have. Think about it; had you not become the Evil Queen, had you let go of your anger and your revenge, had you let love into your heart before it was fully darkened by Rumplestiltskin and by your actions, your fate could have gone many ways. If you’d chosen Robin then, you would have had him for years, for a lifetime. There’s no telling.”

“At the expense of my son,” she reminds her, the bitterness edging itself into her tone.

“Yes,” Tink nods in agreement. “You’re absolutely right about that. But that was the ripple you caused. You made a choice and you’ve lived out that choice along with it’s consequences.”

“So what you’re saying is…”

“What I’m saying is: would you have done anything differently?” When Regina shakes her head, sniffling as her eyes close and her tears fall freely, Tink says, “That’s what I thought.”

When her eyes open, Regina looks at Tink in accusation. “Have you ever heard of the Ethereal Realm?”

“The Ethereal Realm?,” the fairy scoffs in disbelief and when Regina’s face remains neutral, her eyes widen with wonder. “You mean to tell me it’s a real place?”

“Very much so, Tink. In fact, that’s where Robin is right now. I need you to tell me everything you know about it.”

And with that, Tinkerbell lets go of her hand, sits back against the cushions, and begins to tell Regina the tale she first heard on that dewy morning she came into existence, the day the petals of the flower she’d been borne of had opened in bloom, bringing the fairy to life.

…~~…~~…

Lifting herself from charred ground, Regina dusts off the dirt from her hands and clothing. She takes a deep breath, the scent of burnt wood surrounding her. Somewhere a memory comes to the forefront of her mind. _He smells like forest._ A shiver escapes her as she controls her feelings. She’s done crying. For now.

Making her way back out of the valley, a branch snaps alerting her to the presence of someone or something else. Palm facing up, a fireball springs to life as she calls out, “Show yourself!”

The familiar blonde steps into view. “Take it easy, Madam Mayor. Haven’t you scorched enough for one day?”

“Emma. What are you doing out here?,” she asks, extinguishing the fireball at once.

“I saw smoke coming from this direction so I drove out here to check things out, make sure everything was okay and no one was hurt and I stopped when I saw your car. You okay?”

Scoffing bitterly, Regina asks, “Why wouldn’t I be?”

Stepping closer Emma puts her hand on Regina’s shoulder. “You forget about my superpower. What’s going on?”

Regina looks dejectedly at her friend, a woman she once tried to poison to get her out of her life. “I don’t even know where to start. Why don’t we walk back to the cars and I’ll tell you everything at Granny’s?”

…~~…~~…

Emma’s eyes widen in horror. “You’re dying?! All because you didn’t go into that tavern to meet Robin Hood the night Tinkerbell sprinkled pixie dust on you?”

Clucking her tongue in frustration, she sips her coffee before setting it down again. “That’s not exactly what I said. Tinkerbell’s pixie dust was a gift. I didn’t treat it as such. My blatant disregard for that gift, not to mention having been the catalyst for her to lose her wings, caused a ripple, and that’s why I continued my training with Rumplestiltskin, living out this life. If I hadn’t become…what I became,” she pauses, looking down into her lap before her gaze returns to Emma. “If I hadn’t become the Evil Queen, then none of this would have happened.”

“Right. Henry wouldn’t have ended up with you either, Storybrooke wouldn’t exist, much less the United Realms. Our world wouldn’t exist Regina.” When Regina doesn’t say anything, Emma shrugs and offers, “Maybe sometimes we have to go through awful moments to get to the best ones.”

Her jaw falls open in disbelief. “Easy for you to say, you got it all. The pirate returned from the dead how many times exactly? Your family reunited, a new child. Robin,” she says, her voice cracking. “Robin wasn’t even pardoned or given a second chance despite dying to protect me. You know what? I need to be alone right now.”

“Come on Your Majesty, please. Stay and talk to me,” Emma says quietly, as Regina leans back into the booth.

It’s unusually quiet at the diner. The lunch rush is over and only a few people have wandered in to order a cup of coffee to go before wandering back out. She looks out the window, watching Sir Henry moving around the pawn shop animatedly talking to a young couple.

“Did I ever tell you that I saw Robin, my Robin, last year? Before we all cast the curse that united the realms? He came to me in a dream. He said he was always with me, in here,” she says, placing her hand over her heart. “He said he helped me become good, become who I am today. It was his love that brought me here.”

Emma’s eyes well with tears. She’d spent years trying to find a way to bring Robin Hood back for Regina, but when she became pregnant, her magic also became unpredictable, and as an added bonus, she felt nauseous and tired all the time. It was too much for her and she’d been forced to put this mission on hold. She says nothing, waiting for Regina to continue recounting her story.

“In the dream, he placed a red feather in the palm of my hand, closing my fingers over it. I woke up startled, looking at my surroundings. I was in a dungeon, your parents’ dungeon in the Wish Realm, the one they’d used for the Dark One. I don’t know how long I’d been in there, but I was cuffed to a stone I’d fallen asleep against. Our Henry came in a few minutes after I’d woken up to rescue me.”

She stops to take a few sips of coffee and chases it down with an iced water Granny had put before her after they’d sat down. Setting the glass back on the table, she runs a finger over the condensation on the glass, making a swirling pattern.

“Last year, Queenie came to visit me. She and Locksley had discovered a scroll, which prophesied the union of the realms, and it included a territory no one had heard of before known as the Ethereal Realm. That’s where Robin’s soul is. Hades lied, but… Robin’s soul hasn’t moved on. It’s also not in that hellish purgatory, The Underworld. He’s living…in the Ethereal Realm.”

Regina pauses before adding, “She said I could visit my Robin, using the feather he’d given me.”

“And you went,” Emma supplied knowingly. If it were her, she wouldn’t have been able to stay away from Killian either. Regina nodded at her.

“I did. But, there’s a caveat—or at least, I _thought_ there was only the one caveat. Today I found out there was something else.” She leans forward and Emma instinctively senses Regina’s need for privacy so she meets her halfway, leaning closer as well. “Every time I visit him, I lose…” Her words trail off as her eyes break contact with Emma’s. Taking a few seconds to tamp down the misery and anger plaguing her, she looks back up at her friend. “Every time I go to that realm, I am losing a piece of my soul.”

Emma’s eyes widen in shock. “Regina,” she whispers urgently, “You can’t go there anymore. You can’t visit him. How did you find out about all this anyway?”

A bitter laugh escapes her lips as she says, “Tinkerbell. There’s a story they tell the fairies when they’re young. Tinkerbell thought it was just a tale spun for entertainment or to scare young fairies from ever using pixie dust on an undeserving soul.” Regina licks her lips as her eyes close. _Why am I getting the sense of deja vu?_ The memory comes unbidden, just like the last time and she feels in this moment, as though each moment of her life is cyclical—the past is also the present and it’s also the future. She motions to Granny with her fingers, and when the woman comes to their booth, Regina asks for something stronger than coffee. Granny nods knowingly and returns with tumblers and a bottle of whiskey, setting it down with a dull thud. Regina pours herself a small amount, then drinks it quickly, ignoring the burn and relishing only in the numbing feeling it gives her.

“No Regina. I refuse to believe that. If anyone has been down the road to hell and back again, it’s you. There is no other soul more deserving of happiness than you.”

“Emma, you’re forgetting the first rule of magic: it always comes with a price. That price, me not going to Robin on that first night, that was what got me here, in this existence. Knowing what I know now, even having taken that chance I don’t believe I would have been happy because I’d never have had Henry in my life. I’d never trade being his mother for anything. With Robin it’s… In every other realm, every other version of ourselves—we were meant to be together. Even here.” When Emma’s brow furrows in confusion, Regina reminds her, “Queenie and Locksley? My point is: every version of us is destined to be together. Maybe…” She looks out the window again. Sir Henry is now alone in the shop, his torso bent over the counter with a book resting beneath him, a pen in his right hand. Regina smiles sadly at him then looks back at Emma. “Maybe, I’m supposed to die.”

“That’s a load of crap. Look, I didn’t want to say anything sooner because I didn’t want to disappoint you, but, I’ve been working on finding a way to bring Robin back. Even if he can’t return to his original body, I’m sure I can figure out a way to return him back to this realm so that he’s real—I promised you your happy ending and I’m not finished until I—”

Regina’s hand shoots up, silencing Emma, as her head angles down, her dark locks falling over the side of her face causing her to take that hand to tuck the hair behind an ear. “I don’t want that. Don’t you think I would have figured out a way to get him back in any way I could before now?,” she asks looking into the blonde woman’s eyes. “Emma, this is the way it has to be.” Her gaze is determined and resolute.

“But you’ve done so much good, you’ve gone beyond…” Her voice trails off as she watches Regina pour herself another whiskey.

“Emma, I’d like to be alone now if you don’t mind.”

She opens her mouth to argue, then closes it back up when she realizes her friend needs space. She slides out of the booth and stands next to Regina, placing a hand on her shoulder and giving it a soft squeeze. “I’m here. If you need me,” she offers.

“Thank you for the ear, Mrs. Jones,” she smiles bravely, angling her head up. “And please give Sweet Cheeks kisses from Aunt Regina.”

“I will,” Emma smiles down at her before walking out the door, the bells jingling in her absence.

…~~…~~…

That night, Regina looks out of her bedroom window, noticing for the first time in a long time how brightly the stars light up the darkened sky. There’s a gentle knock at her door and she calls out _Come in_ as she turns and sees Sir Henry standing in the doorway. “Hi Ripley.”

Smiling proudly at him, she says, “Hi. Are you going out tonight?”

“Yes. Roland and Henry invited me to shoot pool with them. Alice and Robyn are meeting us there.”

Quirking an eyebrow, she asks, “So you’re going to The Rabbit Hole? Please be careful. It’s not always…”

“Regina, I know,” he says, a smile appearing on his lips. “There’s a group of us so we’re less likely to get into any kind of trouble. Besides, your sons will be there.”

At the mention of both her Henry and Roland, she gasps, not because of their names but because Sir Henry referred to them both as _her sons_ and it makes that damned lump make it’s presence known once again in her throat. She knows if she utters a single word, tears will begin their treacherous flow down her cheeks and she is honestly not in the mood to cry again today; she’s already met that quota. So instead she nods and turns back toward the window. Once she’s sure her voice won’t betray her, she says, “Have a wonderful time,” intentionally leaving out the added _sweetheart_ she used to say when addressing her sons.

She hears the door close, and her eyes close shut, as the tears slide quickly down her face. Bringing her hand up and swiping her cheeks clean, she turns again toward her dresser and opens the top drawer, taking out a small leather-bound box. Her fingers delicately pull the golden flap up and inside she looks at the dates on the small ivory colored envelopes. Running her fingers along the edges of the paper, she takes out the one with last year’s date on it. She closes the box back up and returns it to the drawer, closing it gently before turning to walk to her bed. Laying down on one side, she opens the envelope gingerly, pulling out the red feather and twirls it between her fingers before she holds it in the palm of her hand. “I’m coming Robin.”


	3. The Visit

When Regina opens her eyes, she’s confused. On her last two visits, she had been sitting at a table in the tavern. Now she is lying down in a bed. _Her bed?_ She sits up and looks around at her immediate surroundings, sighing in recognition. She’s in the bed she keeps in her vault. She gets out of the bed slowly, her back eliciting tiny pops as she stretches and looks around. It appears she’s alone, so she gets up and walks toward the mirror on the wall, looking at herself and smoothing back her slightly tousled hair. Her eyes look tired, and she feels worn out.

“You’ve never looked more beautiful.”

She turns from the mirror and looks all around the room, frowning when she sees she’s alone.

“Robin?,” she calls out, sighing in relief when her thief comes out from behind the stairwell, that same smirk he often wore in the Enchanted Forest on his face. He takes her in before taking quick steps to her, closing the distance between them. In another life, Regina’s mind echoes, _My mind was in the forest but my heart brought me here._ And she smiles once just before his lips crash down on hers, his arms holding her tightly in a loving embrace. They part once and she thinks it’s just like the last time they were here, just like this, all those years ago.

Her lips slow down as she presses her hands lightly against his chest. Robin pulls back away from her reluctantly, bringing his hand up to tangle in her hair as his nose bumps lightly with hers before he breathes her in. “Have you missed me as much as I’ve missed you?,” he asks with mirth in his eyes.

“More than you can imagine,” she says giving him a few quick pecks on the lips then taking his hands in her own, she leads him back to the bed and pushes him back until he falls in, chuckling.

…~~…~~…

Their limbs are tangled underneath the thin sheet and Regina thinks to herself that if she died this way, it wouldn’t be a bad way to go. Breathing deeply, she grins happily, feeling loved, adored, and secure with Robin by her side—her Robin, not a carbon copy of him created by her other half’s wish. Her Robin, who smells like a combination of wood, smoke, and a hint of crisp pine reminding her of Christmas, and her happiness starts to slip away so slowly when she considers how short a time they spent together. They never got to spend the holidays together.

She doesn’t even realize she’s slowly moving away from him until the arm he’s got wrapped around her middle tugs her firmly to him.

It’s so odd being here with him this way again. He’s no longer flesh and blood in the literal sense; Robin is a soul. Turning to face him, her hand comes up to cup his face as they kiss. When she pulls away, she rests her head on his chest, noting sadly that she hears nothing, that there is no heart beating beneath her ear.

“You can’t be ready for your red feather yet, my love,” he laughs, kissing the top of her head as his arm comes up behind her, pressing her closer to him. Sniffling, her arm tightens around his waist as she uses her leg to wrap around his, presses herself against his thigh. “Regina? What’s wrong?,” he asks when his head dips down lower. His blue eyes sparkle with concern in the candlelit room.

“I might be joining you soon,” she says as his eyebrow quirks up.

“As I recall, you said those same words to me when we first met here two years ago.”

Taking the sheet with her, she sits up in the bed, leaving his warmth, a warmth she doesn't quite understand because if Robin is only a soul, if he has no heartbeat, why would he be warm?

Just as he had when he was alive, Robin’s hand skirts up her naked back causing her to shiver and look over her shoulder at him. His lopsided grin makes her smile.

“I love you so much Robin, so much,” she says kissing him.

“And I love you Regina, I always have and I…”

She nods, closing her eyes as he kisses her forehead and says, “I know.”

“Then what is it?”

She sighs and pulls away from him, bringing her legs up beneath the sheet as her elbows fold over her knees.

“Once upon a time, many years ago, there was a land known as the Fae Realm. It’s where all of the fairies came into existence, blooming from the beautiful flowers that grow across the expansive garden-land. One of the oldest of the fae, Fiona, was consumed by the darkness. Believing to be on the path toward saving her infant son, she turned herself into a fairy and severed her son’s destiny from him with dark magic. She essentially sacrificed herself and that’s how she became the Black Fairy. She created the Dark Curse. Fiona was banished to the Dark Realm, and when she returned, she was killed by the very son she was originally trying to protect. Before Fiona’s transformation, the fairies lived in peace and harmony, assisting the humans they’d been assigned to at birth. If the humans were in need of any sort of help, they could count on their fairy godmothers showing up just in the nick time.”

Robin doesn’t make a sound, too entranced by her beauty and her words. He drops a soft kiss to her exposed shoulder in a silent request for her to continue.

“I never had a fairy godmother,” she says looking over at him sadly. “So that night, the one I was supposed to have met you, before I ran away from that tavern, I unconsciously made a desperate plea for help. Tinkerbell took pity on me and she came to my rescue. I could have died that night, Robin. I was so angry at my situation that I’d begun rattling the balcony’s iron railing so hard with my clenched fists, I barely registered that it’d come loose. Tinkerbell broke my fall.

“She promised that she’d help me find love again, which is the part of the story you already know,” she says and sighs when his lips brush her cheek and his hand is tracing soothing patterns on her bare back. Turning her head toward him, she captures his lips and kisses him tenderly, slowly savoring him before she lets him go with a soft pop, then traces the outline of his lips with her thumb. 

“When Fiona was banished to the Dark Realm, Ruel Ghorm—you know her as the Blue Fairy—established some rules. One of them was overseeing the use of pixie dust to ensure it was used responsibly. Whomever was given the gift of pixie dust and failed to appreciate the opportunity that had been bestowed upon them would live out the rest of their lives without it. So you see,” she chuckles bitterly and looks at him, her eyes glassy with unshed tears. “I was right. The last time we were here together, I told you that this would end badly, which it did. For both of us. And the worst part of it is: it’s all my fault. I’m the reason you’re dead Robin. I’m the reason you couldn’t be restored to life. My actions, especially that one, came with very steep consequences.”

Robin’s hand ceases it’s caresses along her back and he reaches up to caress her cheek, fingers tangling gently in her hair. Shaking his head, he licks his lips and says, “No, love. You fail to realize: I never once regretted saving your life by giving my own.” He goes on despite the whispered plea, his name, that comes from her lips.

“How can you say that? Roland, grew up without you. Robyn, your daughter, also grew up without you.”

“They were never entirely without me, my love. I was always with them. Just as I always was with you. Now, and forgive me for not understanding, I don’t see where in this story it is that you are in danger of dying,” he says. “So I think we should take advantage of the time while you’re here…don’t you?”

Regina looks into his eyes and smiles, letting him pull her closer and right when their lips meet, her mind recalls another moment of their lives.

_But, if we don’t leave this room, then, I think that this still just counts as the first time, don’t you?_

…~~…~~…

Regina wakes up, shielding her eyes from the bright sunlight streaming in through her bedroom window, as a red feather falls from her hand in a mesmerizingly slow, zig-zag pattern landing on her lap. She gets out of bed and walks into her bathroom, gasping at the sight before her. She’s visibly older, creases now appear in the corners of her eyes and her skin feels dry and just a little think. Regina examines herself for several long minutes, her hand touching her cheeks as she tilts her face from side to side. The skin on her chest is no longer as firm and tight as it was just a day ago, but what makes her eyes tear up is the thick strands of white hair that provide a striking contrast against the rest of her dark locks.

_It’s happening, it’s really happening_ , she thinks to herself. And with that, she straightens her spine and looks resolutely into the mirror again, her mind made up. She knew what she was going to do, and damn anyone who tried to stop her. Waving a hand before her, she magically dyed her hair back to it’s original color and put a glamour spell on her skin to make it appear firmer and youthful before she turns the knob and steps into the shower, smiling when she catches a hint of Robin’s unmistakable scent coming from the ends of her hair.

…~~…~~…

Brunch with Queenie and Zelena had been fun at first. But when they complimented her skin and how she good she looked, like she was glowing, Regina smirked and attempted to steer the conversation in another direction.

Zelena wasn’t fooled and rather indignant. “I can’t believe you’re lying again. First you lied when you started dating Facilier and now this. You went there again, to the Ethereal Realm. This is all a glamour, isn’t it? Don’t you care at all that…” A hiccup stops her from going on. Queenie looks between them, her hand falling over Zelena’s on the table.

Regina leans closer to her sister. “Please don’t be upset with me. I know you’d do it too, if this were Chad.” Her brother-in-law had gradually been told about their lives, and though his first reaction had been disbelief, he soon began to accept that the woman he adored was once the most hated and feared villain in Oz. She glances over at Queenie, knowing she doesn’t need to say a word for her to understand. Zelena is a hard sell though. They’d been through so much together and Regina would have never been able to break the curse that had landed them in Hyperion Heights without her sister’s help. Time had helped them heal their relationship, but it took years before they could fully trust one another. Many tense moments had happened when Robyn was a young child, and she’d curiously look from her mother to her aunt, wondering why they were mad at each other since neither of them spoke her father’s name while in her presence. Oddly enough, they’d arrived at this place, somewhere that offered them peace between them. Zelena knew what she’d done was reprehensible, she knew Regina had every right to hate her. But she didn’t. In fact they’d grown closer than either thought possible. Which is why Regina’s heart catches in her throat when Zelena utters, “You can’t die, sis. We love you too much to let you go. I promise, I will work on finding a way to reverse this, to make sure what you’ve given up is restored. I will find another way for you and Robin to be together. It’s… It’s the least I can do,” she says her voice cracking at the end as two tears cascade quickly down her cheek. Queenie reaches into her dress’ pocket and pulls out a handkerchief, handing it to Zelena who quips, “This hasn’t been anywhere _else_ , has it?”

Queenie arches her eyebrow at her, smirking. “I’m not sure I like what you’re implying but,” she chuckles darkly. “No. It hasn’t been anywhere else. It’s been freshly laundered and pressed by Friar Tuck.”

The three women look at each other, erupting in a fit of giggles, sadness and tears forgotten as their mood lightens and Regina thinks to herself how lucky she is to have so many people who love her.

…~~…~~…

She’s loading her dinner plates into the dishwasher when the doorbell rings. She’s not expecting anyone, but takes the towel from the counter and wipes her wet hands as she walks to the door. Henry, her Henry, is on the other side with a wide smile.

“Hi Mom,” he says cheerfully. “I didn’t catch you at a bad time, did I?”

She stands to the side to let him in, her arms reaching up to welcome him with a big hug and a kiss to his cheek. “No, I was just cleaning up after dinner.”

Henry nods and says, “Smells terrific. Let me guess: lasagna?”

Regina chuckles and putting her arm around his waist as his comes around her shoulder, she says, “I really have become predictable, haven’t I? Come on, I was just about to heat up some apple turnovers. I’ve got vanilla ice cream and caramel sauce too, I know how much you love it.”

They sit at the dining table making small talk. Lucy’s doing very well in school and has actually been placed in the gifted program. She’s also taken an interest in music and wants to try out for the school band. “She wants to play the flute,” he tells her, and everything is the same but also not because he’s not her little boy anymore. He’s a grown man, with a family of his own. Even sweet little Roland had grown up, and she was sure that those dimples would soon capture a lovely young woman’s heart. Everyone had grown into adulthood, making their own lives, and for the first time ever, Regina felt her loneliness in a palpable way. She would have said it was bittersweet, but her heart ached just the same.

“Mom? Mom? Did you hear what I just said?” Henry’s holding her hand now, looking into her eyes.

“I’m sorry Henry, no I didn’t.”

“I said, Jacinda’s pregnant. We’re gonna have another baby.”

At the mention of another child being born into her family, her eyes become glassy and wide. Another little one to hold and shower with love and affection, another to read to, to tell her stories to, it thrills her and a happy grin erupts on her face. “Really?! That’s wonderful! I’m so happy for you, for all of you, for all of _us_ ,” she says cupping his cheeks.

Henry’s hands hold onto her wrists. “Mom,” he says looking intently into her eyes and arches an eyebrow at her. “You sure you’re okay?”

She steps back from him, dropping her hands by her side. Henry, just like Robin, knows her too well to know when she was hiding something. But she doesn’t want to bring down such a happy occasion, she’d feel horrible at having tainted a pleasant memory with her truth; that she would either continue to live out _this_ life at its natural progression, or what was now left of it anyway, or keep on visiting her soulmate every year, losing her life even quicker. Not wanting to dwell on it any longer in front of her son, Regina did was she always did. It was easy. After all, how long had she been doing this very thing—hiding her true emotions, first behind the veil of evil, and then by putting on a brave face to show everyone that nothing would knock her down. She was an expert at making her troubles seem like whatever it was that had tried to break her wasn’t that big a deal. She was used to it, so she knew the lie would slip easily past her lips and she could do it in a very believable manner. Tamping down the gnawing guilt that she was lying to Henry, she told herself what she always did during these moments: that it was for the best.

Placing her hands on his shoulders, she gives him a few squeezes and says, “Everything is wonderful. Come on,” she says moving toward the kitchen as she twists the towel in her hands, and in so doing she remains grounded in that moment, which is all about Henry and his growing family. “Let’s heat up those turnovers and you can fill me in on all the details, like when we’ll be expecting the newest prince or princess.” She smiles and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, and doesn’t notice Henry’s frown. He makes no mention of it, that the same strand of hair she’s just touched has begun to faintly lose it’s dark color, turning into a silvery white.


	4. Consequences

The sky was dark and the wind was blowing. Thunder could be heard from a distance. Regina was walking toward her car from Henry and Jacinda’s house. Her eyes shifted upward. The rain would be starting at any moment and she wanted to get back home before the downpour. Just as she’s reaching for the door, she hears someone call out her name. Turning around, the wind gathers around her and a wisp of her own hair snaps before her eyes, making her reach to move it out of the way so she can see who it is. Ruel Ghorm is running toward her. “Have you got some time?,” the fairy asks.

“I was just on my way home from Henry and Jacinda’s. I was hoping to get there before the rain started,” Regina answers. She tries her best to sound pleasant, but it’s difficult. First of all, she’s tired, can feel the exhaustion seeping down into her bones. Her hands have started to cramp up at odd times throughout the day and her vision had also started becoming blurrier up close. All Regina wants to do is make herself a cup of tea and curl up with one of her soft throw blankets and a good book. Next week she was planning on going to see Robin again, since it’d been a year.

Jacinda had given birth to another little girl they named Cora Regina. It had warmed her heart that they’d honored both her and her mother that way. She’d forgiven her mother for all she’d done to her and to Zelena a long time ago, so the baby’s name hadn’t bothered her in the least. Snow’s reaction, on the other hand, had been positively comical. She’d blinked several times and her lips opened up into a very awkward smile that made Zelena snicker. Regina had elbowed her sister and given them both a warning look. It had been fine though since Henry, Jacinda, and Lucy’s eyes were focused on the newest member of their family.

“Perhaps it’s better if I give you this,” she says, handing her a large, heavy, leather-bound book. “I’ve marked the pages you need to read. They’ll explain everything.”

She turns to leave as lightening cracks and thunder echoes in the distance. “Wait,” Regina calls out to her. “Would you like a ride back to the convent?”

The fairy gives her a grateful look and nods as she gets into the car, pulling the seatbelt over her torso and fastening it with a click. Regina gets in and starts the car, pulling out of the parking space just as the thick, fat drop of water start to fall on the windshield.

…~~…~~…

The hard knocking startled them all out of their family brunch. “Who could that be?,” Robyn asked glancing at Zelena then Chad. Alice reached out to her under the table, her hand squeezing Robyn’s knee in comfort.

“I don’t know,” Zelena says, standing up and wiping a corner of her lips, tossing her napkin beside her plate and walking toward the door. Chad follows her a few seconds later, and stands behind her when she opens it.

“Henry, what are you doing here?,” she asks, stepping aside as Henry storms in, agitatedly running a hand through his hair.

“It’s Mom. She’s aging…very rapidly.”

Robyn and Alice come into the room, forgetting their meal when they’d heard his voice. “Mom, what’s going on?” Robin asks her, but Zelena doesn’t answer her and instead motions for everyone to sit down.

“How much do you know?,” she asks Henry.

“I know she’s been using a glamour to conceal it. At first, it was inconspicuous. Little things. I started noticing that she looks more tired than usual, and lately, it’s all the time. That’s not like her. And when she thinks I’m not paying attention, I watch her grimacing as she struggles to do things she’s never had a problem doing before, like sign paperwork or rinse a dish. Mom’s always been strong, full of energy. She was at our place last night, visiting the baby, and she had trouble picking her up. When I asked what was wrong, she said she was fine but I noticed her hands were frozen and gnarled and when she caught me looking, she tried to hide them. It looked like arthritis, which is ridiculous because she’s too young for that, and besides it’s Mom. She always makes sure she looks her best at all times. Anyway, when I suggested she see Dr. Whale, she said I was being silly, that it was only a cramp. But the skin around her eyes and lips these days is not…looking like Mom at all,” he says, then his eyes light up. “And last year, when I went to see her to tell her we were gonna have another baby, her hair color started to go white, right before my eyes. I thought I was seeing things, but after the past few months, I’m not so sure anymore. Zelena,” he looks at her intently. “What’s she hiding from me? And please, don’t tell me you don’t know, because I know that’s not true.”

Chad’s hand rubs his wife’s back in comfort when she sits down on an ottoman in front of Henry. Robyn reaches out to Alice, her arm sliding around her wife’s waist.

Sighing out loud, Zelena looks at them all then returns her gaze to Henry. “Regina’s…” Her voice cracks and her eyes fill with unshed tears as she stifles a sob.

“You’re scaring me. Tell me what you know,” Henry says, and she takes his hands in hers. The tears start to fall freely from her eyes, leaving a wet trail on her cheeks.

Licking her lips, she tries again. “Henry. Your mother is dying.” Her lips now quiver after voicing the awful truth out loud. She looks at him, waiting for his reaction.

“No,” Henry says firmly, shaking his head. “There must be some kind of mistake. What… Is she sick? I don’t understand. What has she not told me?”

Chad’s hand continues their soothing circles on her back and Robyn also softly cries _Aunt Regina_ , as Alice embraces her with both arms, placing a loving kiss on her shoulder. If it weren’t for Alice’s next words, Henry would have started to feel indignant at being the last one in the know.

“Shhh, love,” she says to Robyn. “I’m sure it’ll be alright. She’s a tough one, your aunt. This is all just a misunderstanding. Innit?” Alice looks at Zelena questioning.

Shaking her head forlornly, Zelena looks down at Henry’s hands held in her own and says, “I’m afraid not. A few years ago, before the realms were united, you went to the Wish Realm’s Enchanted Forest to rescue her from your grandparents’ dungeon. Before you arrived, Regina had a visit.” She looks back up at him and adds, “With Robin Hood.”

“What?! She never told me anything about that! Was… Was he alive? Of course not, otherwise she wouldn’t have needed my help getting her out of there,” Henry says.

Zelena sniffles. “He came to her in a dream,” she explains. “Or, at least that’s what she thought at the time. She was so convinced that your other self was going to murder her, that she was preparing herself to die. Regina ended up in the Ethereal Realm, and that’s where she found Robin, his soul.”

“My father’s soul wasn’t obliterated? He exists somewhere?” Robyn asks tearfully as her mother nods in affirmation.

“Yes. He’s fine as far as I know it,” she says, her eyes dart to Chad when Robyn mentions her father, and she lowers them again in shame. No matter how much Zelena may have grown, that will forever haunt her; she intentionally hurt her sister’s soulmate, tearing him and his son from her with one of the vilest, cruelest, filthiest lies. She adores her daughter, but she will never stop hating herself for using an innocent man so that she could become a mother only to ensure Regina remained unhappy and lonely. Her actions have led everyone here. Robin Hood dead, and Regina

“How come I’ve never heard of this Ethereal Realm?” Henry asks, breaking her out of her reverie. 

“We’d only just discovered it ourselves. Regina stumbled into it when she was readying herself for her death.”

“Zelena, none of this is making sense. I don’t understand how any of this, how the Ethereal Realm, how having seen Robin again, is making Mom die. Where does it all connect?”

“To return her to her current realm, Robin Hood gave her a red feather. He placed it in her hand. The queen, well, Queenie,” she clarifies, “found a scroll a year after we’d all come back here to the new Storybrooke and the United Realms. The Ethereal Realm has always been an unknown realm. Regina happened upon it by accident almost. Her soul remains tied to Robin’s, so he hasn’t fully moved on. When everyone gave pieces of their hearts to unite the realms and bring us all here, the Ethereal Realm came with it. No one knew, not even your mother. Until Queenie found the scroll. The scroll said she could visit him in the Ethereal Realm once a year had passed. He’d help her return by giving her a red feather, but in this way, she would get to be with him.”

Robyn and Alice have both sat down and Chad leaned over to the table behind their sofa, pulling out a few tissues from the box and handing them to his wife silently.

Henry’s voice is numb. “Is this what’s killing her? Visiting him in that realm?” Zelena frowns as she wipes under her eyes and nods at him. “You’ve tried to stop her?”

She nods and wipes another tear from the corner of her eye and fidgets with the tissues balled in her hand. “She won’t listen. Queenie and I have tried to stop her.”

Gritting his teeth, Henry spits out, “It was her who gave her the scroll in the first place.” He stands and heads for the door, his face contorted into a rage.

“Henry, no!” Zelena runs after him, calling out as he’s holding his helmet standing beside his motorcycle. “Please! Listen to me—she didn’t know! She didn’t know about it when she first found the scroll!”

But Henry isn’t listening. He’s too busy undoing the chin straps which is taking him an extraordinary amount of time. Zelena can see he’s sobbing and just as she starts walking toward him, his voice cries out in a rage as he flings the helmet as far as he can then kicks his motorcycle over. Chad, Robyn and Alice run outside. Her husband embraces her on their porch, but the young women run out to Henry and when they reach him, they wrap him in their arms as all three sob together.

…~~…~~…

She’s at the desk in her study at the mansion, her eyes darting from left to right reading the will before her. _I, Regina Mills, being of sound mind and body, do hereby declare that this is my last will and testament…_

Regina sighs and stands, turning to look out the window. The sun is starting to set behind her apple tree, the one Emma Swan nearly destroyed but she’d managed to save with magic. She starts to think of all the things she’s going to miss about this existence. When Robin gave his life to save hers, he unknowingly gave her an extraordinary gift: time. She had been able to see Henry become an adult, finish and graduate from high school, and even go off in search of his own happy ending, putting on a brave face for him so that he wouldn’t suspect how her heart was breaking that he was leaving her.

When Henry had left, she threw herself into her work, making improvements around the town, helping her family when the need arose. Many weekends she babysat little Neal or Robyn. Life was good, but when she was alone in that big empty house, the deafening silence was often too much. She’d get out of bed no matter how much she told herself she needed to get some sleep and she’d go into her study and work. Or she’d organize closets, the pantry, the guest rooms. Once during brunch with Maleficent, she’d talked about how she felt just a teeny, tiny bit lonely, and her friend had narrowed her eyes down at her and smirked, then insisted she ought to book a vacation for herself, get out of town for a little while. But Regina adamantly refused, she said the town depended on her, making Mal scoff and roll her eyes. After that, she never brought it up with another soul again. Not until after the realms were united and she’d confessed it to Queenie a few years ago. She wasn’t as lonely as she had been right after Henry had gone since she was back in Storybrooke and was now surrounded by friends and family from every single realm. But something was always missing, and that something was Robin.

Whenever she thought of Robin, her emotions were a jumble. Anger, sadness, regret, but also love—so much love. Because he’d given her more than she could ever pay him back for. He’d given her life, he’d given her years. His sacrifice had brought her so many years of happiness, but there had always been that niggling feeling that let her know it could have been so much more. What would life have been like if Robin hadn’t died? She knows they would have eventually married even though they’d never actually discussed it. They’d have raised their boys together, as brothers. She’d never have felt as alone as she did that first night when Henry left on his motorcycle and went through the portal. No one knew what really happened that night: she’d fallen asleep in Henry’s bed sobbing. When she woke the next day, she’d felt exhausted. Standing up from the bed, she’d looked at her reflection in the mirror, not surprised to find she looked the way she felt. The tears had run through her caked on makeup, causing her skin to look streaked and her mascara and eyeliner had smudged. “You’re a mess,” she’d said aloud, then sighed and walked to her bathroom to shower and clean up for the day.

Regina looks back down and stares at the will, then her eyes drift over to the leather-bound book that the fairy had given her. She lets her fingers run over the nameless cover, then picks it up, examining the spine. There are symbols on it, and she’s sure she’s seen them somewhere before, only she can’t remember where. When she turns the book vertically, she can see a thick portion of it has been clipped, so she sets it down on the desk over her last will and testament, opens it, and begins to read.


	5. The Soulmate Bond

Soft lips and the scruff of his beard dotted her shoulders and neck with loving kisses. “Good morning, my love,” said Robin in a raspy voice.

Regina opens her eyes. She’s in her bedroom, and is momentarily confused thinking the red feather might not have worked but she doesn’t see it anywhere by her. It usually disappears while she’s in the Ethereal Realm, and ends up in the drawer where the rest of them are, labeled in their own envelopes by year. “Good morning,” she says, stretching out slowly. While she’s in this realm, her physical ailments never seem to bother her. She’s looked at her reflection in objects from the mirror in her vault, to one of the glass windows in the tavern when she’s woken there. Now she tries to recall where they’d ended up, and it’s fuzzy. They’d had wine, assorted cheeses and fruits, sharing another picnic by the fireplace. Robin had been waiting for her in her living room, wearing modern clothes instead of his typical forest attire. He’d looked so handsome. In truth, he always did. The light of the fire had seemed to radiate all around him, creating an angelic halo that outlined his body, and when he’d held his hand out, she moved toward him like a moth to a flame.

Kissing her shoulder once more, he whispers in her ear, “What are you thinking about?”

She turns to face him and cups his cheek. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

His expression is puzzled, and his arm comes up, resting an elbow on the pillow and angling his head into his hand to look down at her, giving her his full attention.

Breathing him in once more, she places a kiss to his lips and says, “Every year I come to see you, I’m losing my life. It’s not obvious here and I don’t know why. Perhaps that’s why we both look the same as we did…before you died. But when I return, I have to conceal my appearance.”

“No one else knows?” Robin asks frowning. “Why keep coming here if it’s costing you so dearly? My love, you must cease this at once. There’s no need to keep coming here. I’ve waited for you, I’ll keep waiting for you. It’s not a hardship—”

Regina holds her finger to his lips, silencing him. “I know. And I didn’t know about this until after I’d already been here a few times.” She sits up, bringing the sheet with her to cover herself, and she places her pillows against the headboard as Robin does the same thing. Once they’re comfortable, he takes her hand and brings it to his lips. He doesn’t let go of it and waits for her to resume the story. “Departed souls can survive in the Ethereal Realm indefinitely. The souls that end up here are waiting for their other halves,” she says squeezing his fingers. “Time moves differently here. It may feel like we’re spending more time together than we actually are. For you, I might be here a few days, a week, or it may feel like a month. But for me, it’s only one night. That’s what makes me age faster. When I’m here, your soul is joined with mine, and you remember me just as I remember you when you were alive.”

Robin shifts, removing the sheet from his body and adjusts himself to sit closer to her taking both her hands in his. “Regina. I don’t want you to come here any more. The price is too great. It’s not worth it. I’ll continue waiting for you.”

The look on her face silences him. “Robin, everyone is either moving, or have already moved, on. Roland’s about to get married. Henry’s been married for years, and now he’s got two beautiful girls. Robyn and Alice are expecting a baby boy any day now. Zelena, Chad, Snow, David, Emma and the pirate—everyone—they’re all living out their lives. Even Granny and Marco were wed in a small, intimate ceremony. My existence is mainly solitary, save for brief moments I spend sharing with my large family. And I love them. This isn’t about that. This is about me being…ready…to take the next step, to make the sacrifice that will…lead me to you,” she says with a smile on her face. “I’ve lived a terrible, sad, angry, but also wonderful, surprising, and heroic life, full of many twists and turns. I’ve come full circle. Robin,” she says, leaning into him as his hands cup her face, stroking her cheeks, then confidently declares, “I’m ready.”

…~~…~~…

In the early morning light, Queenie and her Robin, Zelena, Chad, Henry, Jacinda, the Charmings’ and the Jones’ all stand outside Regina’s mansion.

“Henry, open the door please,” Queenie says firmly, and when he does, they all step inside, taking the stairs to Regina’s room. The door is closed and Queenie asks them to give her a minute then vanishes in a cloud of purple smoke, reappearing inside of the room where she finds her other half asleep, a red feather clutched in one hand, the only part of her that peeks out from under the sheets. The feather is vanishing. It has a glow around it, and looks translucent. Regina’s in the Ethereal Realm and Robin Hood must be getting ready to give her another feather so that she can return. Queenie pulls the sheets as gently as she can to make sure Regina isn’t naked, and relaxes when she sees the collar of a light blue silk pajama top.

She walks to the door and opens it, letting them in. Once inside, Henry, Snow, and Emma gasp in horror as Queenie motions at them angrily. She’d already warned them they had to be quiet and couldn’t jolt Regina awake. They had to wait for her to wake up on her own, after her visit was over. Snow’s hand trembled as she brought it to her lips in horror. Before their eyes, they could see Regina in her unconcealed state. Her entire head of hair was silvery white and appeared much thinner. The roots seemed to be turning lighter, whiter. Her face was full of pronounced fine lines and wrinkles, and they were most obvious around her eyes and lips. Her skin looked drier, weathered by time. Her breathing was deep and for the most part normal, but it didn’t escape their notice that every several breaths, she’d struggle and take a labored one.

Emma quietly went to stand beside Queenie and whispered through her teeth, “Is there nothing we can do for her?”

“Not right now. We have to wait for her to wake up. Then we’ll proposition her.”

Sighing, Emma says, “What if it doesn’t work, Your Majesty? What if she says no?”

Robin of Locksley has been looking between the sheriff to his wife and leaning over, he takes Queenie’s hand in his and whispers, “It’s no longer her decision.” 

…~~…~~…

They continue waiting in her living room. When they hear movement upstairs, Henry texts her. _Mom, don’t freak out, but I’m downstairs with the family. We decided to surprise you with breakfast._

A few minutes later, three small dots appear on Henry’s phone and then Regina’s message shows on the screen. _Is everything alright?_

_Everything’s fine, Mom. Just come down whenever you’re ready._

_Give me about 20 minutes. I love you Henry._

_I love you too, Mom._

…~~…~~…

When Regina arrives downstairs, she’s shocked to see them all. When Henry said he was with the family, she originally thought it was just him, Jacinda and the girls. Having ten people gaping at her with mouths open automatically brought her defenses up. It was too early for this kind of visit. “Did you mean you were surprising me with _breakfast_ , or with the _entire_ _family_?,” she laughs and tucks a strand of now dark hair behind her ear. She hugs everyone, except Killian and Locksley, whom she gives a friendly but awkward nod to. They all stare at her. Now that they’d witnessed her in her true state, physically appearing the way they were used to, they could see areas where her magic hadn’t completely worked; a small wrinkle near the scar on her lip. One lone silvery strand on the back of her head that was so thin it would have been easy to miss had her hair been lighter. 

Frowning, she looks over at the dining table and says, “I don’t see any food on the table, but I can magic some if you’d like.”

Queenie steps forward and says, “That can wait. Regina, we found a way,” she smiles. “We found a way for you to live, and you can keep seeing him too.”

…~~…~~…

The last few years, Queenie and Zelena had continued working on finding a way to reverse the aging effects caused by her visits to the Ethereal Realm. Last year, they’d asked Locksley to break into Regina’s mansion while they were out one afternoon. They’d planned to have lunch after visiting the Storybrooke salon.

Locksley had found and taken the fairy book Mother Superior had lent Regina after he’d opened and read the first few paragraphs. He brought it to Queenie, where she’d pored over the clipped pages until the sun’s rays were streaming in through the castle windows. She felt tired but she knew what she needed to do. Convincing her husband, however, might be a different story. But surprisingly when she shared her idea, their hands holding onto one another’s, he nodded in silent agreement. _‘I will always love you,’_ she’d said then kissed him passionately. _‘But she’s sacrificed too much not to have this. You and I have had years together. And if you think about it, we will still be together, in a new way. You know that, right?’_ He hadn’t said anything. Instead, he’d taken her into his arms and carried her to their bed, slowly removing her clothing. They made love several times that morning, and by the afternoon, Queenie had been panting exhaustedly, asking him to please stop, that she was too sensitive and she needed to sleep for a while. He’d given her a break then, and when he stood to say he would get her some water, she’d waved her hand over their bed and a long tray on two slanted legs had appeared with plates of eggs, bacon, toast, fresh fruit, and coffee. An iced pitcher of water and two glasses appeared in his hands as his wife smiled at him. They’d eaten and when they’d finished, the tray and everything on it had vanished. They drifted in and out of sleep that day and onto the next, ignoring the dings of messages coming from their cell phones. After they’d showered and climbed into their bed once more, stretching out on fresh, clean sheets, they’d turned to each other and he said, _‘Will we remember? The memories of our life together, the last twenty years we’ve been married, will we remember? Or will they just…vanish?’_

Kissing her husband, she whispered sincerely, _‘We’ll remember.’_

…~~…~~…

“ABSOLUTELY NOT!,” Regina roars angrily at them, her eyes wide with fear and fury. Queenie looks defiantly at her, chin up. Snow mumbles nervously that surely there has to be another way, and the rest of them remain silent, a somber mood fills the air. It’s Locksley who approaches Regina and stands before her.

“Your Highness, with all due respect. The decision has been made. My Queen and I have been very happy, and we owe what we have had to one person: you. When you found me in my realm, I was not the man standing before you today. You remember I once told you I couldn’t live up to the legacy of a man who died for you. Well, I believe your Robin Hood and I are a lot more alike today than the man I was back then.” His hand comes up to her shoulder and he leans forward. “Regina, let us do this for you. We aren’t going to lose our memories.”

Looking at him sadly she says, “No, but you’ll be apart. You’ll be there with him.”

“Yes, and my wife will be here with you. But you’ll both be able to come and go as you please without consequence until you both cross over.”

She looks into his blue eyes, and _this_ is why she usually avoids him. The more years go by, the more he resembles her Robin. “You would die so that we could come and go freely? I…can’t let you do that. I’m sorry. Now, if you all don’t mind, I’d like to be alone please.”

“Mom,” Henry implores her. “Please. They want to do this. I think you should let them.”

She holds her hand up and says, “I’m tired. I need to go and lie down.”

They all shuffle out, but Queenie lingers behind. “Regina, just think about it. We’ll still have our memories. The soulmate bond connects us all.”

“You read the book,” Regina says, her eyes narrowing at her other half.

“I did. Robin stole it last year. I know that our denying the gift caused a ripple which led us to where we are today, that ripple caused you and I to split.”

“You severed your destiny from mine,” Regina sniffles.

Queenie says, “Yes, I did. But I still had all our memories. This would be the same.”

“You do realize that your husband would have to die and you and I would have to become one again, right? I can’t allow it to happen,” Regina says.

“My husband _wouldn’t even exist_ if if weren’t for our split and my wish,” she affirms. “We owe you more than you imagine. This ripple we created can be fixed.”

Regina looks away feeling ashamed. “I don’t want anyone to die.”

“But you’re fine dying yourself?,” she scoffs. “Didn’t you read that part of the book? There aren’t any guarantees that with both you and Robin Hood gone, my husband and I would go on living. We might cease to exist altogether. You’re being foolish,” Queenie says then starts to walk toward the the stairs in the foyer that lead to the front door. “Just…give it some thought.”


	6. Broken Mirrors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was not run through a beta so all mistakes are entirely mine. As always, thank you for reading, for leaving kudos, and for your comments.

There was nothing to think about. Regina’s mind was made up. After everyone left, she’d looked at the calendar in her planner determinedly and chose a date circling it with her same black pen. She left everything else as it was without making another mark nor did she elaborate what her plans were. She already knew. A sense of peace washed over her as she thought _soon, I’ll be with Robin forever_.

Her hands closed her book and she sighed exhaustedly as she looked down at her hands, studying them. Aging snuck up on most people but on her it had exploded. Her skin was weathered and brown freckled spots decorated the backs of her hands. Her forearms bore the wrinkled texture of aged skin. She stood and walked slowly to one of the many mirrors that decorated her home and stared at herself. She didn’t have the energy to glamour herself right now and it didn’t matter anyway since she was home alone and everyone else was gone. She promised them she would try not to visit Robin again in the Ethereal Realm, mostly to placate them since Emma and Zelena were busy working on ways to reverse her rapid aging process.

Queenie was the only one who knew and that’s why she’d made Regina her proposal. The fact that Locksley had agreed to it had flabbergasted her. She’d only have ever expected this from her Robin, who did die for her. And though becoming one with Queenie again made the most logical sense, Regina knew that it would only bide her extra time. Besides, she knew that Locksley would end up in the Ethereal Realm merged with his other half as well, existing on that plane, and waiting for her. For them.

Regina brought both her hands up over her face. Why was everything so damn complicated for her always? She felt an excruciating exhaustion come over her and as she looked down at herself, at her slightly hunched body still attempting to maintain a regal stature, she let out a shaky breath when she heard the voice.

“It isn’t worth it, Your Majesty,” said her mirror.

“Sidney. What are you doing here? I didn’t summon you.”

“No, you didn’t. But I’m here nevertheless. Regina, please don’t do it,” he begged.

In a moment she went from feeling bone tired to angered fury. “You don’t get to tell me what to do. You don’t get to have an opinion,” she yelled at the top of her lungs then let out an earth-shattering scream that every single mirror in her home fractured into fragments. The scream seemed to last a long time, but all Regina remembers is the room going slanted as she blacked out, her body hitting the floor hard among broken shards.

…~~…~~…

“Ripley?” The soft voice was near. She can feel her head cradled in someone’s hands as they smooth her hair out. 

“Henry?,” she answered, her voice barely above a whisper. Her throat felt raw and dry, and before she can open her eyes she asks for some water. He tips a cool glass to her lips as they part to let the cool liquid flow in and it’s bliss. Opening her eyes, she looks around before looking up at him, and her hand comes up to cradle his face which is a beacon of concern and fear.

“What happened here? Are you okay? I…” His voice drifts off as his fingers twirl a lock of her now white hair between them. Regina has nowhere to hide.

“I’m dying,” she says simply. “One too many trips to the Ethereal Realm.” A short, dry chuckle escapes her, and her voice makes her heartbeat speed up. It’s her but it sounds nothing like her. It’s frail, elderly. Unrecognizable. “Don’t look so worried. I’m still me, just…a different version of me.”

Sir Henry helps her over to her couch and sits her down. “I’ll go make some tea,” he says as she nods and watches him walk toward the kitchen, listening to the sounds of cupboards opening and water running and the unmistakable click of the gas stove being brought to life. He returns several minutes later with two steaming mugs of tea, the bags looped around the handles, and he sets them down on the coffee table as she thanks him.

Regina is in no mood to discuss her plans so she instead asks why he’s not out with Fiona. He tells her she’s sick, came down with something called a stomach bug and he asks her about it and in that moment, everything seems so normal. She’s in her home, having tea, and this is Henry, who’s a grown man but who nevertheless reminds her of her little boy because _her little boy_ is now also a grown man. Her little boy has a wife and children of his own and a job and a home, and this Henry is somehow closer to her old Henry and suddenly the pangs of sadness fill her chest, and she wordlessly begins to weep.

“A stomach bug isn’t anything serious, Regina. Fiona will be alright,” he explains as she smiles at him, laughs, and says she knows. He takes her hand and looks at it. “It’s too soon,” he says simply. “I… We…” He’s at a loss for words. “I understand.”

She angles her head up at him. “You do?”

Sir Henry nods. “I know why you go. Henry, Emma, and Snow told me.” He smirks in amusement when her raspy voice whispers _tattletales_. “If you feel that’s where you need to be, that it’s time to be with him, I’ll understand. But… I’m going to miss you.” When she tries to say something, he hushes her by squeezing her hand and promises, “I won’t be selfish. I’ll be strong.”

She nods and lets her tears fall down her face. “I”m going to miss you too, Henry.”

He puts an arm around her shoulders and sits them both back against the cushions as they sit there enjoying the peace of the moment, the broken glass around them all but forgotten.

The Queen is dying. Everything else can wait.

…~~…~~…

As the date neared, Regina thought she’d feel apprehension but instead she only felt peace. She was too tired now to continue using the glamour spell on her whole self, so instead she opted to use it only to mask her hair. Every morning it would return back to the rich, deep espresso hue she’d lived with most of her life. She used the best serums and makeup foundations to make her skin appear as tight, luminescent and fresh as possible. Word had spread throughout the realms of her condition and everyone respectfully never made mention of it directly to her. She was often greeted with great respect from the inhabitants, with only a handful of people who’d watch her until she’d meet their eyes and smile, then they’d often look away feeling embarrassed. She didn’t hold it against anyone. The fact was that for them, it had seemed as though she’d transitioned almost overnight from looking like a woman in her early forties to a woman who appeared to be almost ninety. Naturally, it was jarring for most people.

Granny was one of her greatest supporters, and Regina often lamented why they’d never developed a friendship sooner. And Granny, always as sharp as a tack, would quip that she’d have ripped her to shreds in wolf form, making Regina snicker and shoot back that it would have been difficult since she’d have likely thrown fireballs at her until she was nothing but a pile of ashes. Sometimes they’d get strange looks from other patrons at the diner, which would only make them laugh harder. And life was still good for Regina. She’d kept her promise to everyone and hadn’t visited the Ethereal Realm again, and though she was eager to see Robin, she would quell her desires by thinking of that circled date in her calendar. She knew there wasn’t much time left before they would be reunited again for good.

…~~…~~…

Queenie and Zelena took her out for brunch and over mimosas, she dodged her other half’s questions about whether or not she’d made her mind up. When she prodded her with the fact that they didn’t have much time, Regina had held up her glass with one hand and placed her index finger over her lips with the other. “When in Rome, Queenie,” she said, and downed the mimosa in three large gulps, gasping for air as she placed the glass back down on the table, making the other two women laugh aloud.

…~~…~~…

If there was one thing Regina was determined to do, it was to make life seem as normal as possible for everyone around her. She refused to address or acknowledge what was happening to her, and everything continued to be the same as it had always been, with the exception of her appearance. She continued to babysit her family’s children whenever the need arose, thought she once overheard the pirate say to Emma, “Weeds don’t die, luv. Regina will be around for another three decades, I’m sure.” She’d smirked at her reflection in the bathroom, rolling her eyes at Killian’s lack of tact at the same moment she’d heard a strong thump and him grunt out a clueless, “What did I say?”

She knew it was hardest on Henry, Emma, and Snow. They’d been through so much together, and whenever she tried to address them about who would become ruler once she was no longer around, they’d get annoyed at her and say that they wouldn’t ever give up on her, that they were determined to find the cure, the solution. Regina didn’t bother to argue with them because it was moot. They were Charmings, and Charmings would do what they always did. It made her smile, she mused as she thought back on their history.

…~~…~~…

The night before the fated night, the one she’d chosen as her last day in this world, Regina was reading Henry’s original book of fairy tales, her hands had traced the words of stories she’d practically memorized, and the painted images of her family and friends. She looked up at the clock when she heard a tap on her front door. It was after ten, and she didn’t know who it could be but something told her to answer it.

Her home was mirrorless now, and she hadn’t bothered to replace them. She didn’t need Sidney spying on her, or giving her his unsolicited opinion. The man had always had the propensity to become unhinged and this was one plan that she didn’t need any assistance with.

Standing, she calls out to her unknown guest _Coming!_ She sometimes needed a cane to stand but tonight her joints felt fine. Gripping the staircase, she takes each step down into her foyer with care and is at her front door a minute later. When she opens the door, Ruel Ghorm, or Mother Superior as she continues to go by in this land, is there.

“Hello Regina, may I come in?,” the fairy asks tentatively, as Regina’s hand sweeps in a gesture indicating her to step into her home.

She can’t remember when they’d become friendly toward one another and right now, that’s the least of her worries. Regina is, for the first time, completely carefree. She’s finally a woman who’s made the decision about her life entirely on her own without the influence of anyone around her, and whatever the fairy has to say, is inconsequential.

“Would you like some tea?,” she asks, closing the door behind her guest, and slowly making her way back up the steps and into the dining room. The fairy looks shocked, and it takes Regina a moment to register why; she’s entirely natural, and for those who haven’t seen her this way yet, it’s a shock.

“No, thank you. I won’t be long. I’m here for the book,” she says quietly and smiles as Regina turns to face her.

“Of course. Let me get it for you,” she says then walks to her study where the book rests in a corner, untouched in weeks.

When she returns to the living room, the fairy is looking at the photographs of Regina’s family, artfully framed along a wall. It doesn’t escape her notice that she appears to be looking at the photos of her, Robin, and their sons. It’s an old photo, they all are, but Regina enchanted them so they’d be magically protected from aging, and the irony doesn’t escape her that she was able to do that with her family’s photographs but not with her own life. But since that’s neither here nor there, she clears her throat to announce her arrival, and Mother Superior straightens up as her hands touch her face, and without turning to face Regina, she whispers, “I’m so sorry. For everything. For refusing to help you. For punishing Tinkerbell because she wanted to help you. Things might have turned out differently for you, for him,” she sniffles then turns to face her, her nose is red and runny and her cheeks are wet. “You’ve come full circle, Regina. I know that this, despite what you’ve said to justify it, wasn’t truly your happy ending. It was your mother’s.”

Regina opens her mouth to protest, but the fairy gives her a pleading look that silences her. “I know what you’re planning to do.”

She cannot help the stiffness in her back as her shoulders tighten and her chin angles up in defiance. “My plans are not anyone’s concern but mine,” she says primly. After everything she’s been through, Regina isn’t leaving anymore of her life to fate, to chance, to the whims of petulant fairies, princesses, dark ones, or a malignantly narcissistic mother. She’s fully in control and so she stands there and says nothing else. She’s not going to engage in this conversation.

A blue glow emits from the woman as her nun robe falls to the floor and a blue gossamer gown falls down her body, as her wings spread out behind her. Regina looks at her in disbelief as the fairy seems to emit wavelengths of light and energy from her core. The windows fly open and winds come into her home, strong winds that cause her hair to swirl in every direction, blocking most of her sight. “What are you doing?” Regina yells out, but the fairy’s eyes have gone back in her head as her body rises in the center of the living space within her home. A roaring sound dies down into a screaming wail, the cries of someone in agony. It’s all coming from the fairy.Just as Regina’s about to take a step forward toward her, an object hits the back of her head hard enough to make her fall into darkness.

The familiar voice she hears next is so unexpected, she jolts upright. “Well, well, well. It certainly has been a long time now hasn’t it, dearie?”


	7. Darkness Will Always Find The Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all of you for reading. I hope you'll enjoy this final chapter.

Regina stood up in a flash and only briefly noticed that her hands had been restored to their youthful appearance. She’s in a room full of clouds, and when she looks down, her eyes only see as far as her knees. Everything else is shrouded in white mist. Even though every fiber of her being screamed at her that this was wrong, that she was clearly in the wrong place, a paralyzing tranquility had washed over her anger simultaneously, keeping her in place as she looked defiantly at her former teacher, mentor, and sometimes friend. She didn’t want to feel this conflicted, but she was certainly confused. Was she dead? Had Ruel Ghorm killed her? And if she was dead, where was Robin? 

“The answers you seek are forthcoming. Please, walk with me Regina,” Rumplestiltskin says plainly, extending his arm out to her.

She shakes her head at him. “You’re dead. I watched you die. Am I dead too?” She sounds frantic, but she’s nonetheless comforted by the sound of her old voice, confident, strong and resonant, the voice of a queen not an elderly woman.

“Come with me. I’ll explain everything,” he says and puts his elbow out for her to take hold of. “No tricks, I promise you.”

Reluctantly, Regina takes his arm and begins to walk with him. She’s not sure where they’re headed or how far they’ll go, but she reminds herself to be patient, to give him a chance to explain. This man is not the same one who trained her in the dark arts.

As they walk, he smirks at her and says, “You look well, Your Majesty.” At this, Regina stops and orders him to cut it out and answer her, refusing to take another step. “Your crimes have all finally been forgiven, in their entirety. Think of it as a curse that was put on your life.”

Furrowing her brown she asks, “Curse? Forgiven? What are you talking about?” 

He leads her over to a bench that appears from the mist the closer they get to it and they sit down, the mist adjusting so they never see their feet.

“You know about the pixie dust, the legends among the fairies, the stories told and why and how they became so protective of pixie dust, how everything is…all tied together. I always warned that all magic came with a price.”

She purses her lips in exasperation. “How can I forget? But Rumple, how does this all tie in together? Please, please tell me I’m about to see Robin. I don’t want to have died only to continue to be apart from him now.” She tries to stifle the knot in her throat, to continue to show her strength even now, but it’s there, betraying her, threatening to elicit the tiniest of cracks in her voice and give way to her vulnerability, something she’d always been loathe to display.

“It was always up to the fairy,” he says to her, leaning back with a frown. “She was so angered, so infuriated because one of her own had tried to help you, that you’d ended up cursing the land—several times—that you were given a gift from the fae and let your fear, your anger, throw it away.”

Regina scoffs. “And here I thought this had happened on the whim of the gods,” she says bitterly, remembering the sight of Robin’s spirit turning to face her and… Her eyes widen in recognition. “Robin,” she says excitedly as Rumple looks into her eyes. “When Robin died—after Hades killed him—his spirit turned, to face me. He was surrounded by a blue glow, an ethereal light.” She can feel the wheels in her mind starting to race madly, trying to piece things together. “Do you mean to tell me—?”

“That the Blue Fairy was responsible for the ripple was caused in the original timeline of your life, the one where you never went into that tavern, that you lived a life of isolation, a life of loneliness until Henry came along and changed your destiny? Yes. But as fate would have it, the fairy did not—could not—change the direction of _that particular part_ of your story, because you were always meant to meet, and be with, your soulmate. The fairy could have fixed everything whenever she’d wanted to. Instead, she let your Robin Hood die. It was all part of her own resentment, toward you. Because of Snow White, because you’d tried to kill her. The fairy wanted you to suffer, and what’s worse is: she enjoyed watching you suffer, for many long years. But alas, Regina, it’s over. She’s undone everything and you’ve been forgiven. It’s _all_ been reversed. _You’re not dead_.”

She’s at a loss for words. Robin’s death did seem odd inasmuch as it’d been apparently affected by a different kind of magic than Hades’ death. Where Robin’s spirit flew away, Hades’ spirit went nowhere and his body turned to a pile of ashes, even though they’d been killed by the same weapon. The tense knot of anxiety in her throat relaxes it’s hold on her as she finally lets her tears fall down freely. “Rumple,” it’s barely a whisper from her lips, but it’s a plea nonetheless. She doesn’t even worry about sounding desperate at this point. “Where is Robin? I have to see him, I have to know if,” her voice cracks and she takes a deep breath and sniffles. “I have to know if he’s alright. Please.” Her eyes search her friend’s and Rumple’s hand comes over hers, giving it a comforting squeeze.

“Your Majesty, you and your Robin have been given another chance at a life together. The fairy made the ultimate sacrifice, herself, so that you, every version of you, and your thief, and every version of the thief, would be together again, in every realm. A true second chance, a happy beginning, a guarantee that you and he would be—will be—together for all eternity. Your soulmate bond is whole again, and it’s repaired. _Everything_ is forgiven.”

At this Rumple stands, and Regina finds it hard to, finds that her legs are trembling with shock. It’s a foreign feeling for her, and she has to blink the tears away squinting her eyes as she sees two shadows walking through the mist in the distance as Rumple looks over at her and smiles warmly, reaching his hand out to help her stand.

As the strangers’ get closer, she can make their outlines out. It’s a man and a woman, and not just any man or any woman. It’s Belle, and she’s with Robin and Regina wails out his name, making him run toward her as most of his upper body comes into full view and they’re both crying. When Robin finally reaches her, he cradles her face in his hands and kisses her passionately all over her cheeks, lips, head, hands, and she’s smiling brightly through her tears. “Did you…? Are you…?” He’s wondering if she’s dead, and when she smiles at him, shaking her head, his puzzled look makes her laugh softly.

“I’ll explain everything later,” she promises, taking his hand tightly in her own. “But right now, it’s time for us to go.” She looks over at Rumple and Belle and smiles, then throws her arms around each of them, thanking them.

Rumple takes one of her hands and brings it to his lips. “Regina, if anyone deserves their happy ending, it’s you. Now, go find it. And promise me, you will never let it go again.” She murmurs through tears that she won’t, she swears she won’t, and takes a hold of Robin’s hand again. Turning to Robin, Rumple bows his head, then puts an arm around Belle as they turn and walk, fading into the mist.

“What happens now, my darling?” Robin asks. She beams at him, her hands cupping his face and kissing him several times.

“Whatever we want,” she says.

…~~…~~…

It’s another morning in the realms. The sun is shining in Storybrooke, birds are chirping, and there’s a crispness in the air, the promise of change, of one season transitioning to the next one. Regina opens her eyes, has a look around without lifting her head. Her bedroom is the same as it’s always been and she gets out of bed, planting her feet into the slippers she keeps nearby as she yawns and pulls her robe on, standing and tying the belt into a loose loop, her hand coming up to casually run through her hair.

She gasps. Her hair. It’s back to it’s rich, dark chestnut shade, but that’s not all. She stares at her hands in wonder, smiling at the smooth skin, any and all signs of aging have faded, and it’s still not enough so she hurries over to the bathroom, to one of the only mirrors now left in her house, and she happily laughs out loud at the reflection staring back at her. It’s as though not a single day has gone by since her coronation as ruler of the realms. And though she’s glad to see things are back to normal, the pang in her gut makes her rush out of the room and fly down the stairs, peeking into every room as her heart races with anticipation. When she scurries into the kitchen, her eyes are wet with unshed tears. “I can’t believe this,” she whispers as she falls down into one of the chairs and sighs aloud, letting the tears stream down her cheeks.

After a few minutes, she wipes her face then dries the wetness on a towel, and gets to work on preparing her morning cup of coffee. She’s just about to put the grounds into the filter when something flies rapidly by outside her window.

Regina reaches for the door that leads out to the backyard and nearly faints when she sees an arrow lodged into the bark of her apple tree, a piece of parchment attached to it with a string. As she walks toward it, her eyes dart all over, trying to find something, to find some _one_. But she sees nothing and so when she reaches the tree and takes the arrow, removing the parchment, she walks back toward the house, and sits on a stone stoop that rests beside an old, thick oak. She looks around once more before focusing her attention on the parchment. Her heart is inexplicably beating wildly and her stomach is fluttering. She unties the string, and as she starts to unroll the paper, feathers begin to fall out, all of them red, falling in slow, zig-zag motions toward her slippers, some landing on the dewy grass. _‘Are you willing to take a chance on a new story?,’_ the paper reads as her mouth falls open, her hand coming up over it as she laughs dryly. She continues to look around, to try and find him, but he’s nowhere, and her worry is leading way to anxiety, and mild annoyance.

And then, a breeze picks up and she closes her eyes. She’d recognize that scent anywhere. “Robin,” she says, keeping her eyes closed.

And from behind comes the swoosh and footfall of someone who’s been hiding in a tree, making her smile and open her eyes when the voice says, “Hello my love.”

…~~…~~…

They marry in a small, quiet ceremony in her home soon after his return. The two Henrys walk Regina down the aisle, as Roland stands at his post as best man beside Robin. They both look at her as she makes her way to them, Roland with a smile so big his dimples are deeply on display, and Robin with adoration and unconditional love in his eyes. Regina has never felt this kind of happiness in her life before. Everything is complete, everything is perfect. From the small crowd gathered, she can hear an infant crying softly, and when she turns her head, she can see Robyn putting her arms around Alice and their son, Christopher Robin. Alice places a small stuffed bear in a red shirt in his arms and the baby immediately quiets down, cooing happily. Regina winks at them and the women blow her kisses and smile back. Robin watches them all, wiping a tear from the corner of one eye, and chuckling when Roland leans over to whisper something in his ear.

The ceremony is short but very intimate. Regina and Robin have written their own vows, and when they kissed for the first time as husband and wife, a light, gentle rain started to fall over them and their guests. The newly married couple broke apart laughing at one another as everyone else darted quickly into the mansion, where hors d’oeuvres, and drinks are being served. Everyone greets them with heartfelt congratulations, making sure to let Robin know how much he’d been missed and that it’s wonderful having him back, his men being the most affectionate with big bear hugs and a few misty eyes.

As they made their way around their guests, thanking them for coming, Queenie and Robin of Locksley finally stand before them with beaming smiles. “We’re thrilled for you, and we hope you’ll both join us for dinner sometime soon,” she says to the newlyweds as Regina nods her head enthusiastically, laughing when Robin and his double examine one another with curious smirks.

…~~…~~…

Zelena, Snow, and Emma all make toasts, but it’s Granny’s toast that makes her tear up, and soon Regina and Robin cut their wedding cake as pieces are handed out to their guests. They watch their family with contented smiles, never letting go of one another, always making sure they’re linked.

Alice, Robyn and Roland animatedly chat together, as Henry puts his arm around Jacinda while Lucy plays with her baby sister. Even the pirates are having a good time, toasting with their rum-filled flasks and when Sir Henry and Fiona join them, Killian tips his flask toward the young man inviting him to take a drink.

Regina feels Robin’s arms link around her middle. “Mind if I whisk you away for a moment? I’d like some privacy with my new wife,” he whispers in her ear and she nods happily, her face turning to kiss the tip of his nose lightly.

They end up in her room—their room—all heated kisses, roaming hands, and breathy sighs. They don’t let themselves get too riled up; Regina gently reminds him they’ve got a house full of wedding guests who will soon be going home and then they’ll have all the time in the world.

Robin’s eyes crinkle at the corners when he smiles at her, leaning in for one more kiss before they leave the bedroom, an unspoken agreement between them that so much more will happen later. When their lips part, he says, “I still can’t believe you entrusted your whole life, that you almost gave it all up, for a common thief like me.”

Regina smiles at him as his hand reaches for the doorknob, her head angling slightly as she cups his cheek lovingly and says, “You’re not a common _anything_. You’re my husband, and soon you’ll also be crowned king.” At this, Robin blows out a nervous breath, but Regina kisses him again, before leaning back and with a smile, she bumps her nose against his. “You have nothing to worry about. I am, and will be, _with you_. Always.”

 


End file.
